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So, for like the past 10 years or so I’ve been out as bisexual. Maybe it’s the wrong time for me to be bi… But, women keep ghosting me, or simply never respond whatsoever. I have sent out dozens of messages that almost always go unanswered. Or if someone actually does - We are either incompatible at critical levels (like religion) or they just stop talking. I’ve never actually had a girlfriend because, literally most women who actually do bother to answer usually disappear after a few short messages.
So what is it? Is there something off-putting about my appearance or what I have said? I’ve met really terrible people that manage to find a girlfriend, and here I am at 37 unable to get any girl to actually talk to me. After all this time, you’d think that statistically I would manage to find a woman to actually be in a relationship with. But it’s never happens! And when I message them, I just say stuff like, “hey? How’s it going?” Or, “Hey, really liked your profile, you seem intriguing” etc. so how come there are so many creeps out there who managed to get girlfriends, yet these ladies will never even talk to me? It’s really insulting and painful after all this time when I really want a girlfriend.
I’ve never had this problem before with men, at least not until recently. I’ve made a similar post to this in the past, but a lot of time has passed. I’ve also changed my profile on this and other sites many times. I’ve sort of stopped giving f**ks, and actually started addressing it for once on the profile itself – but normally I just state who I am and what I like, just like anyone else. So what gives? Online dating is the only way I’ve ever tried to meet women, it’s really hard to meet women where I live because they’re really isn’t an LGBT place to go for this stuff as I live in a small area.
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Apr 28, 2024 21:46
It sounds more like a situational problem. Being as the sites you go on don't have the activity you desire and where you live there isn't much options to meet people. I used to live in a small town too. |
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Apr 29, 2024 05:09
The lack of replies on here isn’t personal. Sites likes these are heavily imbalanced with so many more men than women and the women are usually swamped with messages because of this. It makes it hard to reply even when they want to. |
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Apr 29, 2024 14:40 This site is not great for striking up conversation, I’ve noticed, but since you mentioned you haven’t had much success on other sites either, maybe it’s just the fact that women get more attention on dating sites and have to be more selective about who they choose to engage with. You’re basically in the same boat as all the men here with the whole getting no replies to dozens of messages thing. I will say it’s interesting to see that a woman has also tried that strategy though, send out a bunch of feelers and see what you get in return. There’s usually like a 5-10% rate of reply in my experience. The only success beyond that I ever had was asking a question about pineapple on pizza. That seemed to be a great icebreaker and you’re welcome to steal it! |
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Apr 29, 2024 15:00
This site in particular is pretty dead, but from what I understand women get tons and tons of messages so they don't tend to respond to all of them and tend to drop people at the drop of a hat (in mine and many other mens experiences). You also have to factor in that a smaller percentage of women are into other women. And to parrot of Flyglitter, even some bi women have a preference for men over women. I've known several women to be bi, but almost exclusively date men for instance. My ex was like this. She was attracted to women, but exclusively dated men and seemed to really prefer them even as far as attraction went. |
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Apr 30, 2024 01:23 There's only so many big tiddy goth gf's going my dudes |
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Apr 30, 2024 09:36
"Romantic", "extremely monogamous", "serious romantic relationship". I had a feeling I'd find something like that before even clicking your profile. |
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May 1, 2024 05:26 Dark horse has a point about bisexual women being less monogamous. It’s hard to find ones that are okay committing to one side. I generally avoid people that would be missing something they want by being with me. Maybe go for straight women? |
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May 1, 2024 05:49
I thought I might have stirred the hornet's nest with that one. It's good that people understand my point for what it is and don't take it the wrong way. |
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May 1, 2024 18:19 @dark nah, I think you're onto something. And from what I have heard second-hand is lesbians also stear clear of bi-women because it seems most "bi" women are just mostly straight women who want to experiment with a woman before ultimately dating a man. |
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May 1, 2024 20:25 Same here ! I think they are very absent here and don't respond because of the frequent dms that they receive most don't want to respond nowadays I think we're gay at the wrong time in this lifetime! They seem to not want to be bothered by anyone! |
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May 3, 2024 04:55 Oh duh haha. I wasn’t paying attention to who posted, go for lesbian women then. Some apps let you set your preferences by sexual orientation which is nice. |
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May 5, 2024 19:26 since you said u only want friends, that leaves ou the other half looking for more in a relationship--just a thought |