well this is traumatic diane bartek has left me i think waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gonna blow my brains off now (please dont worry wont do it its just pain darling)
her last message
please stop talking to me if you cant help me
oh ok
have you blocked me now like all the other bulls**t girls?
oh you havent thank god for you dear girl
You are not serious
what the f**k kind of drugs you on darling
i just told my mom you left me, she said youre unreasonable
i told you the banks are closed right now!!!
and i cant open the bank account for you because i cant leave the house woman!!!
my mom and wife are saving the money for you!!!
i asked my mom we dont need a bank acct for you to save money right mom?
she said no, i dont need a bank acct to do that
you are acting like a kids i dont like that
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
yes you need to act mature
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
better find abetter man darling
ok
bye
hangouts davidyuwiz plzzzzzzzzzz talk with me at least 10 minutes before you blow me off plzzzzzzz i beg you i am extremely lonely
well this is very nice im seeing three girls after diane blew me off...sherri lynn serrato, wade beck and valerie leroy from france are all talking to me... i see my strategy is not completely self destructive lol.... yes talked to my mom about this, i told her why did i let all those other girls push me around and tell me i cant talk to any other women when i m with them and then they still break my heart and want me to blow my brains out....(i dont think im lying that i went exclusive with all these s**t girls)(would rather kill myself than lie, i suffer way too much emotional pain, guilt suffering, thinking worrying and suffering to actually lie to someone)
i might actually be able to find the love of my life without wasting my time with all those garbage s**t girls....
please dont be hurt by the below message.... on youtube i learned that the weak man who listens to others and cares more for others than himself is most likely to fail in life... i am through being the walking doormat and letting everyone treat me like s**t... im so sorry
ok ive gone through the whole exclusivity s**t with another girl (other girls actually i think), this is what i sent new stuff in parantheses... this is what i will send all women i message while im with you, yes i will continue sending messages to girls but tell her youre my number one choice, when my mom and wife gets plane ticket, we decide which girl best for me, but you will always be my number one choice until you blow me off
hello darling, well ive found another girl her name is diane bartek, i love her with all my heart and soul and she is my number one choice right now and only if she blows me off like all you girls do whether in 10 minutes, one hour, one week, or one month, she will remain my number one choice, she is completely free to pursue any guy she wants until i am able to get the plane ticket from my mom and wife (and she and you never have to tell the guy that im involved with you), but she will always be my number one choice until she blows me off like a sack of potatoes in the forests of middle earth...you can tag along for the ride, but you will only be my number one choice if she blows me off like lilies in a haystorm in pluto....
ive wasted three years of my life going exclusive with you s**t girls (i dont think im lying, rather kill myself than lie) and you all broke it off with me over f**king money... its disgusting, deplorable and forget about being with me if youre s**t... had enough of this bulls**t.. . youre wasting my time when i could be using it to find the love of my life...
(so sorry about my extreme emotional pain, but you girls deserve my hatred) (please dont worry i will never hurt you like youve hurt me)(still love you all)
ok some of the talk i had with her...
what did she said about the account let me know
yes i told her all about you
i told her how you never said any romantic or sexual bulls**t like other girls
nor asked me for money nor told me not to talk to other girls well until that last message
oh about that last message ive already sent you what i intend to say to all those bulls**t girls and you are completely free to talk to any bulls**t guys you want to darling
you do NOT have to say youre involved with me, i am completely prepared for you to blow me off
just like all the other thousands of worthless piece of s**t girls ive encountered since starting this journey into hell 3 years ago
oh about the bank acct!!! lol
what
yes my mom says banks are closed right now, but even with bank open i wont go there darling, i have severe malaise towards world and i wont ever step outside my house again until you hold my hand and kiss me outside
are you open the account or not
no
when youre here, we can open a bank acct together darling
but you have to hold my hand and kiss me all the way to the bank
well this is traumatic diane bartek has left me i think waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gonna blow my brains off now (please dont worry wont do it its just pain darling)
her last message
please stop talking to me if you cant help me
oh ok
have you blocked me now like all the other bulls**t girls?
oh you havent thank god for you dear girl
You are not serious
what the f**k kind of drugs you on darling
i just told my mom you left me, she said youre unreasonable
i told you the banks are closed right now!!!
and i cant open the bank account for you because i cant leave the house woman!!!
my mom and wife are saving the money for you!!!
i asked my mom we dont need a bank acct for you to save money right mom?
she said no, i dont need a bank acct to do that
you are acting like a kids i dont like that
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
yes you need to act mature
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
better find abetter man darling
ok
bye
darling pleeeeeeease i beg you i beg you please do not talk with me for one day one week one month and then ask for money, this is devastating and i cant stand it any longer plz only talk to me if youre serious about me plzzzzzzzz i beg you
darling you would not believe the hell i went through with money stuff getting blisters on my feet for two hours walking to bank, girls asking for cheques, bank account details, credit card details, western union, gift cards, plane tickets, etc etc etc ad nauseum.... 99% of you girls have money problems.... lol
its very sad in some cases but in most cases its very greedy
some girls are very very poor one girl linda emanuelle in france lives in commune, one other girl works in a food mart, jennifer perry has to ask her neighbors for a pizza for food to eat etc
but the rest of them are greedy
why does this keep happening to me.... first things i tell girl are i have no money no job (but when youre in my life, there is a strong possibility i can resume the second love of my life, my art, i am world class artist and may be able to get commissions from people on the internet or do my own work, my own work much preferable because its unpredictable and always unique, imaginative and creative )but it all hinges on if you will be standing in my doorstep and in my arms forever) (i dont know how long it will take, it depends how much happiness you can give me to annihilate the malaise and extreme emotional pain i have towards the world, my family my relatives my friends and my enemies), my wife and mom take care of me (and will take care of you too, your children, your dad, your mom, your grandma), im living in my moms house, im useless a loser and a failure im not leaving my wife no matter how beautiful you are (im not in love with my wife, i will divorce her (were common law married) to marry you, but i am never kicking my wife out of my moms house ever ever ever), im not sexual (you can put it in, i love to do with you, but im gonna pull it out when im close to cumming, and im very weak sexually), i dont want any children (you can have as many boyfriends as you want to have children, but please i beg you to spend at least 20% of your time with me, if not please tell me and ill let you go now), im too innocent and i dont know anything about the world (thats what cynthia said when she left me) and not normal etc and still i get girls wasting at least one whole day of my life talking to her and night thinking of her and then asking for money....this is ridiculous...
i already gave my life savings to the homeless so the fact is im homeless and poor too
and i cant work because of the 99% jealous men and uncaring women wont even give me a kiss or hug
and my father treated me like a slave and made me insane while in high school and university even though full scholarship top of class in everything and could be lawyer engineer or computer scientist to take care of you and maybe the homeless and my wife and son and mom however i am still a world class artist and this is the second love of my life, art, comic books movies and videogames and rob says(wonderful comic book store owner and only friend i have in this city) that with your skills and talent david you can get commissions from people to do what they want you to do for them (instead of doing your own work, but this is much more preferable, the work i do is always unique and i make it up as i go along, not repetitive and always enjoyable i like thinking about what im going to do next and i like the surprises and unpredictability (im a surrealist artist), but while this is enjoyable spending time with you is infinitely more enjoyable, like with cynthia) and then when you have enough money you can get a girl, but cant work right now and even with you in my life i dont know when i will be able to work again, it depends how much happiness you will give me after a lifetime of misery pain and suffering from before i met cynthia and then after i lost cynthia (2 year relationship),
i better put down every bad thing about myself from now on so i can get rid of all the deceitful and manipulative women no morals ethics or principles said by m on 99 secrets and coach red pill on youtube will tell you good stuff about myself if youre really really serious about me and dont tag me along for a few days and then ask for money... lol not until my mom comes back from world cruise with dad (shes now back, had to cut it short from coronavirus)
well yesterday was full of despair and misery wasnt it lol... today i feel much better... since i started this again about two weeks after my mom left on her world cruise (in january) i was able to find about 10 to 15 girls wanted to spend their life with me but because i didnt have plane ticket or visa and they were too poor themselves they left me for guys with more money i suppose lol sob.... i know i have two of three qualities necessary to attract a beautiful girl in my life... i have my looks blessed to me by mom and i want to live forever with one of you pretty girls...i would rather kill myself than to leave you for whatever reason, it would cause me too much emotional pain to leave you even when youre old fat and ugly because 1) im already too fond of you for being with you so long and 2) i would feel extreme guilt suffering and pain if you feel any pain from me leaving you.... however you are completely free as my wife (who is getting fat and ugly, but never leave her no matter how beautiful you are for the exact same two reasons) to leave me...the third thing i need is that f**king plane ticket.... lol sob my mom and wife are helping as much as possible on this third one, but my wife cant work right now because of coronavirus and she lost a lot of money because the business has some construction problems blocking traffic, and my mom has no money right now...i cant work because noone will hire me because im depressed and i cant work even if they would hire a depressed loser because i suffer way too much from the 99%, the jealous guys who wont share their girlfriend wife and the uncaring unloving girls who dont have boyfriend husband but wont kiss me or hug me naked in bed because i have wife, even though i told them that my wife told me millions of times not to worry that i love another, shouldve told them also i can divorce my wife although we are only common law married no papers but not gonna kick my wife out of my moms house (not in love with wife, but will always love her) lol... i gonna tell mom im feeling better today because i have hope that i will one day get that plane ticket (or that 25$ that claire wants for her internet connection, one of the most precious girls i met so far), butttt dddaaayyyyyuuuum i wish i was like coach greg adams he said dont concentrate on finding the girl, concentrate on your business establish yourself financially, you will never ever again have to chase girls, they will chase you...my little bear said same thing concentrate on your art daddy noob, establish yourself financially and you will find girl, rob at comic book store said with your skills and talent david you should be able to get commissions from people on internet, then after getting enough money you can get some girl...should also ask mom if she thinks girls are bad for blowing me off for that plane ticket or money, alyson dakota needed 500$, sherie santos needed money for the visa and plane ticket, jennifer perry needed money because she needs to ask her neighbors for pizza to eat, angela lisa smart needed that plane ticket and i actually did accumulate 1500$ for that plane ticket (i left dating site for a while after sherie santos to accumulate money)
but left me when i told her my wife took that money, my mom didnt like this girl and said if she comes here she will kick me out of house, i said this to angela that no prob angela i can easily get a job with you in my life, then she left me cause she said i have no value soooooooooooooooooooob.....sophie eislander needed 500$ then left dating again, then came back for a third time (this is the third time), gifty didnt want any money at all (the most precious girl i have met since i started this s**t mess) (also the only one i have wrote a love poem in my own private notes it was more as a diagram chart graph because i am a logical as well as deephearted thinker) (she said she would get all the money for visa and plane ticket) but left me after the first day of talking (i dont know why, she didnt tell me, but it was after our conversation that i sent her the info necessary for ghanaian residents to come to canada, and she never talked to me again, although i told my wife and son about her that night and said i fully intend to marry this girl to bring her here, my wife said wait until mom comes back so we know what to do about our common law marriage), then rebecca who needed 693$ for hotel bill in africa, and then lastly vicky valentine (who i saw online in free date again yesterday, under a different alias) who wanted me to marry her in her country, but i need money for that and she and i dont have money....goddamnit, i really hate myself now for not even being able to get a f**king plane ticket aaaaarrrrgh...yesterday night, i told mom that i wish i had s*x with cynthia and gave her children if she wanted to spare me this future heartache, my mom says its in the past you have to push forward, but you girls are better than cynthia you dont need the s*x (i told all you girls im not that sexual, i wish i was that animal you want in bed, im too weak to do it, can do with wife many times, but after 5 secs i drop like a sack of potatoes in the siberian winter lol) and you dont need the children...you just need the f**king plane ticket.... gonna ask my mom whos better you girls or cynthia...
hmmmm im gonna ask my mom tomorrow whether or not she thinks the world is as evil as i think it is...im interested in peoples perception of themselves and others and the world in general.... if she doesnt think the world is as evil as i think it is, my perception is that she is as evil as the rest of the world or nearly as much... lol sob.... please dont worry i love my mom extremely much, she just terrified me most of my life, i know how much she loves me now, just terrified of other peoples perceptions...should i kill myself because i think the world is as bad as i think it is? please dont worry i wont kill myself, i just have extreme emotional pain (emotional instability) matched with extreme behavioral/ emotional controllability (never criticize, never yell, scream, angry violent etc) (i do cry a lot, though which is a combo of emotional pain and emotional uncontrollability lol sob)
well this is traumatic diane bartek has left me i think waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gonna blow my brains off now (please dont worry wont do it its just pain darling)
her last message
please stop talking to me if you cant help me
oh ok
have you blocked me now like all the other bulls**t girls?
oh you havent thank god for you dear girl
You are not serious
what the f**k kind of drugs you on darling
i just told my mom you left me, she said youre unreasonable
i told you the banks are closed right now!!!
and i cant open the bank account for you because i cant leave the house woman!!!
my mom and wife are saving the money for you!!!
i asked my mom we dont need a bank acct for you to save money right mom?
she said no, i dont need a bank acct to do that
you are acting like a kids i dont like that
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
yes you need to act mature
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
better find abetter man darling
ok
bye
hmmmm youve blocked me now havent you
holy s**t not yet!!!
please dont be hurt by the below message.... on youtube i learned that the weak man who listens to others and cares more for others than himself is most likely to fail in life... i am through being the walking doormat and letting everyone treat me like s**t... im so sorry
ok ive gone through the whole exclusivity s**t with another girl (other girls actually i think), this is what i sent new stuff in parantheses... this is what i will send all women i message while im with you, yes i will continue sending messages to girls but tell her youre my number one choice, when my mom and wife gets plane ticket, we decide which girl best for me, but you will always be my number one choice until you blow me off
hello darling, well ive found another girl her name is diane bartek, i love her with all my heart and soul and she is my number one choice right now and only if she blows me off like all you girls do whether in 10 minutes, one hour, one week, or one month, she will remain my number one choice, she is completely free to pursue any guy she wants until i am able to get the plane ticket from my mom and wife (and she and you never have to tell the guy that im involved with you), but she will always be my number one choice until she blows me off like a sack of potatoes in the forests of middle earth...you can tag along for the ride, but you will only be my number one choice if she blows me off like lilies in a haystorm in pluto....
ive wasted three years of my life going exclusive with you s**t girls (i dont think im lying, rather kill myself than lie) and you all broke it off with me over f**king money... its disgusting, deplorable and forget about being with me if youre s**t... had enough of this bulls**t.. . youre wasting my time when i could be using it to find the love of my life...
(so sorry about my extreme emotional pain, but you girls deserve my hatred) (please dont worry i will never hurt you like youve hurt me)(still love you all)
ok some of the talk i had with her...
what did she said about the account let me know
yes i told her all about you
i told her how you never said any romantic or sexual bulls**t like other girls
nor asked me for money nor told me not to talk to other girls well until that last message
oh about that last message ive already sent you what i intend to say to all those bulls**t girls and you are completely free to talk to any bulls**t guys you want to darling
you do NOT have to say youre involved with me, i am completely prepared for you to blow me off
just like all the other thousands of worthless piece of s**t girls ive encountered since starting this journey into hell 3 years ago
oh about the bank acct!!! lol
what
yes my mom says banks are closed right now, but even with bank open i wont go there darling, i have severe malaise towards world and i wont ever step outside my house again until you hold my hand and kiss me outside
are you open the account or not
no
when youre here, we can open a bank acct together darling
but you have to hold my hand and kiss me all the way to the bank
well this is traumatic diane bartek has left me i think waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah gonna blow my brains off now (please dont worry wont do it its just pain darling)
her last message
please stop talking to me if you cant help me
oh ok
have you blocked me now like all the other bulls**t girls?
oh you havent thank god for you dear girl
You are not serious
what the f**k kind of drugs you on darling
i just told my mom you left me, she said youre unreasonable
i told you the banks are closed right now!!!
and i cant open the bank account for you because i cant leave the house woman!!!
my mom and wife are saving the money for you!!!
i asked my mom we dont need a bank acct for you to save money right mom?
she said no, i dont need a bank acct to do that
you are acting like a kids i dont like that
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
yes you need to act mature
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
better find abetter man darling
ok
bye
hangouts davidyuwiz plzzzzzzzzz i beg you talk with me 10 minutes before you blow me off lol
woooooooooow had a great talk with mom, i was complaining and crying about how my life and brain is so much s**t, so awful, the horrible mental illnesses of depression, anxiety disorder, anorexia and obsessive compulsive disorder (doctors diagnosed as schizophrenia (maybe because there is a chance i have the delusion that i might be evil, but its just me worrying that im evil, not being evil itself (worrying is a melancholic predisposition, but ocd people also worry too, also melancholics are righteous never lie never cheat never steal and never hurt anyone or anything, i think thats why i started worrying obsessively about being unrighteous, because i would rather kill myself than be unrighteous, oh and you saw the word obsessively too didnt you lol yes thats my ocd lol, melancholics are obsessive too, but not about righteousness usually, more obsessed with thinking, creativity, the power of creation (such as art, music, writing, philosophy, invention, technology, nuclear bombs lol etc ), but they said that it was thought disorder which is a subtype (one type) of ocd), the horrible friends and family and enemies, the horrible world (the jealous selfish and greedy guys and the uncaring unloving girls)...i told mom i wished i was born m on 33 secrets or dan bacon or a rock star like mick jagger who has hundreds to thousands of girls to sleep with and or to eventually have relationship with, she said these rock stars have horrible life, drugs, etc the pressure, then i later said i should be born a beautiful girl, then she said yes you should, why wasnt i mom, go ask god, david....yes if i was born a girl i would try my best to make every guy on earth happy, no matter how ugly old or fat they are, always give them hug and kiss and try my best to sleep with them if theyre not too ugly or old or fat just as long as there is no chance NO CHANCE i will get pregnant (terrified of being pregnant and having children), if there is even 1% i will get pregnant f**k off guys you are waaaaaaaaaaay too into s*x its disgusting to be honest, why arent you talking about comic books, art, video games or movies, or philosophy, science, math, religion, the malaise you have towards the world, personality, psychology, world politics, quantum mechanical theory etc you guys are useless and waaaaaaaaay too stupid), try to give them as much money as possible, etc... i wanted to do this as a guy (not to sleep with guys, girls!!!!! geeeeeeez, you girls all think im gay!!! im not) (just like when i was playing bns and one guy said to those faction s**theads "leave him (me) alone, he's (i) in love with him (mr. chiglet) (hes my only dear friend in the game)"... yes damn you i would tuck him into bed with my wife and kiss him goodnight you assholes!!!
ha ah haa hh a ha ha ha ha ah h
and i would do the same with all you f**kheads if you gave me the time of day!!! ha ah hah ah hah ahah yes darling i love everyone lol
also in talking with my son luke when i told him gave my life savings to homeless and sacrificed life to please my father, and spent 1-2 hours everyday practicing piano to please my mom, and always trying best to please teachers (teachers pet), and developed severe breathing problems trying to please mom at work and then cynthia when i left my moms work to go get her and be with her, and would give everything i have to the love of my life (thats you darling) my son said to me "stupid daddy noob stupid daddy, what if the girl leaves you, what if those homeless dont give you anything back" i would add i shouldnt have sacrificed life to please father if he doesnt love me in return (and he doesnt, he never said sorry, and when he did, it didnt come from his heart, much yelling and screaming in the years since he destroyed my life) (just like all you girls never said sorry for destroying me lol soooooooob), yes darling i learned the value of reciprocity from my son luke (just as my soulmate luke in china said to me," we work together, we take care of EACH OTHER" (crying now), have i been doing everything wrong darling?
let them ask you for money, davidwiz, they give you the gift of their beauty and they talk with you in your extremely lonely miserable existence...its your own fault you suffer extreme pain from them leaving you for money...as dan bacon said on you tube "96.375% of women do not want you to be hurt when they reject you" (the others are lesbians he said, but im thinking why do lesbians want to hurt men?)
listening to "everybody hurts" right now, almost crying "dont blow throw your hands (my own words dont blow your head off)". if youre on your own in this life and the days and nights are long, if youre sure youve had too much of this life to hang on, everybody hurts, sometimes, everybody cries, sometimes, everybody hurts... sometimes hold hold hold on hold on hold ooon, hold on, hold ooooooon, hold on, its not youre not alone" (crying now)
youd rather kill yourself than to do anything terrible or be evil daddy noob... you think way too much about doing anything wrong than to actually do anything wrong... you worry and suffer way too much about doing anything wrong than to actually do anything wrong... you suffer from way too much guilt and suffering and extreme emotional pain to do anything wrong...(is this the same way to say it as my son saying id rather kill myself than to do anything terrible or evil?) (im extremely righteous never lie, never cheat, never steal, never hurt anybody insect or animal (gave life savings to homeless, cant kill hitler even if i was in front of him and had gun to do it (ironically, it was while in church that they gave me gun, i used it once, was absolutely horrified by it, shaking, please dont make me use this ever again (crying almost right now)) (as a baby on sidewalk next to my pink pebble house, i was worried of stepping on the floor of hurting the insects), and definitely never ever hurt the love of my life (never criticize you, never hurt you, never yell at you, never scream, never cheat on you, stay with you for the rest of my life and for eternity after and a day more after that unless you get sick of me like my wife has) (yes, i developed severe mental illness constantly worried about if i did something wrong, starting with the goldfish i was taking care of in my dads pumphill close mansion, then stealing 75 cent comic books to 50$ hardcover graphic novels (elektra assassin), then cheating on school tests, then the possibility of lying to you girls about anything,
and worst of all almost killing my grandma while i was taking shower in toronto in my uncles house, leaving the shower curtain on the outside of the bathtub, the woman i loved more than my own mom at that time, and of course the woman i loved the most in the whole world, and then had the thought "did i have a thought for one second or one half second that i wanted to kill my grandma", and thinking of this did make me think i might have had this thought, making me suicidal for many years, even when i told luke the one of three loves of my life (the other two being luke, my son and yes i named him after luke my soulmate in china (and also luke skywalker), and cynthia of course) about my grandma trauma i said to him the situation and i asked him, "should i suffer if i purposefully hurt or killed my grandma (who i love so much? did i say this too?)" he said to me after thinking for a while about it "yes you should suffer, but you MUST NOT SUFFER" i cried in joy at his response (presumably because he said this because he loved me and didnt want me to suffer) (and yes, while i was walking alone in china, i was suffering extremely about the grandma dilemma, and i thought i was worse than hitler, but i pushed it back saying to myself, no, push it back luke loves you you cant be complete garbage because of that) , but it did not solve my dilemma, he should have said "you wouldnt and cant hurt your grandma, you have suffered way too much about this for you to have actually hurt or killed your grandma on purpose", it was not until i was 40 years old that my mom said "you wouldnt do anything terrible david youre my son and its not in your character" (crying now), and my own son luke solved this in only 2-3 months of talking to me what phds in psychology and psychiatry couldnt do, he said " youre too scared (s**tless) to be evil, daddy noob, you want to kill yourself if you are evil (did terrible things)" but when the doctors in the foothills hospital told me to write down what i think my problem is, the answer was there in what i wrote... (will write this later i think)
well yesterday was full of despair and misery wasnt it lol... today i feel much better... since i started this again about two weeks after my mom left on her world cruise (in january) i was able to find about 10 to 15 girls wanted to spend their life with me but because i didnt have plane ticket or visa and they were too poor themselves they left me for guys with more money i suppose lol sob.... i know i have two of three qualities necessary to attract a beautiful girl in my life... i have my looks blessed to me by mom and i want to live forever with one of you pretty girls...i would rather kill myself than to leave you for whatever reason, it would cause me too much emotional pain to leave you even when youre old fat and ugly because 1) im already too fond of you for being with you so long and 2) i would feel extreme guilt suffering and pain if you feel any pain from me leaving you.... however you are completely free as my wife (who is getting fat and ugly, but never leave her no matter how beautiful you are for the exact same two reasons) to leave me...the third thing i need is that f**king plane ticket.... lol sob my mom and wife are helping as much as possible on this third one, but my wife cant work right now because of coronavirus and she lost a lot of money because the business has some construction problems blocking traffic, and my mom has no money right now...i cant work because noone will hire me because im depressed and i cant work even if they would hire a depressed loser because i suffer way too much from the 99%, the jealous guys who wont share their girlfriend wife and the uncaring unloving girls who dont have boyfriend husband but wont kiss me or hug me naked in bed because i have wife, even though i told them that my wife told me millions of times not to worry that i love another, shouldve told them also i can divorce my wife although we are only common law married no papers but not gonna kick my wife out of my moms house (not in love with wife, but will always love her) lol... i gonna tell mom im feeling better today because i have hope that i will one day get that plane ticket (or that 25$ that claire wants for her internet connection, one of the most precious girls i met so far), butttt dddaaayyyyyuuuum i wish i was like coach greg adams he said dont concentrate on finding the girl, concentrate on your business establish yourself financially, you will never ever again have to chase girls, they will chase you...my little bear said same thing concentrate on your art daddy noob, establish yourself financially and you will find girl, rob at comic book store said with your skills and talent david you should be able to get commissions from people on internet, then after getting enough money you can get some girl...should also ask mom if she thinks girls are bad for blowing me off for that plane ticket or money, alyson dakota needed 500$, sherie santos needed money for the visa and plane ticket, jennifer perry needed money because she needs to ask her neighbors for pizza to eat, angela lisa smart needed that plane ticket and i actually did accumulate 1500$ for that plane ticket (i left dating site for a while after sherie santos to accumulate money)
but left me when i told her my wife took that money, my mom didnt like this girl and said if she comes here she will kick me out of house, i said this to angela that no prob angela i can easily get a job with you in my life, then she left me cause she said i have no value soooooooooooooooooooob.....sophie eislander needed 500$ then left dating again, then came back for a third time (this is the third time), gifty didnt want any money at all (the most precious girl i have met since i started this s**t mess) (also the only one i have wrote a love poem in my own private notes it was more as a diagram chart graph because i am a logical as well as deephearted thinker) (she said she would get all the money for visa and plane ticket) but left me after the first day of talking (i dont know why, she didnt tell me, but it was after our conversation that i sent her the info necessary for ghanaian residents to come to canada, and she never talked to me again, although i told my wife and son about her that night and said i fully intend to marry this girl to bring her here, my wife said wait until mom comes back so we know what to do about our common law marriage), then rebecca who needed 693$ for hotel bill in africa, and then lastly vicky valentine (who i saw online in free date again yesterday, under a different alias) who wanted me to marry her in her country, but i need money for that and she and i dont have money....goddamnit, i really hate myself now for not even being able to get a f**king plane ticket aaaaarrrrgh...yesterday night, i told mom that i wish i had s*x with cynthia and gave her children if she wanted to spare me this future heartache, my mom says its in the past you have to push forward, but you girls are better than cynthia you dont need the s*x (i told all you girls im not that sexual, i wish i was that animal you want in bed, im too weak to do it, can do with wife many times, but after 5 secs i drop like a sack of potatoes in the siberian winter lol) and you dont need the children...you just need the f**king plane ticket.... gonna ask my mom whos better you girls or cynthia...
on forum in flirthut, one guy helped me tremendously with my thinking, cynthia is not the right girl for you david, need to find someone with similar s*x drive, it should be easy for you, just get over your emotional pain from cynthia, huge road block cleared i thought cynthia perfect girl, well she is perfect perfect for someone else lol sob (shes sooooooooooo pretty exactly like lilia in my paintings, same type of body, hairstyle, not as pretty face though lol (dont get me wrong, cynthia had a pretty face), wore exact same type of dresses, not sexual, more romantic), she s peaceful loving and caring obedient (we can do whatever you want david it doesnt matter to me... shes so precious, lets me be leader instead of follower like i have been whole life), she just needed s*x (also she said i m not normal, too innocent, and doesnt know anything about world when she left me, the not normal part to my mom i think)
Been suicidal (severe emotional pain) from 1998 to now losing the love of my life Cynthia
I really need and want a girl that wants to spend time with me, hold my hand and kiss and hug me. We touch each other's skin; no s*x is preferable but we can do it. I didn't do it with the first wife so she left me and I've been suicidal since. She left me in 1998 until now, 2021, and I will be suicidal for the rest of my life unless I find true love again. She was my dream girl. She always dressed like my dream girl 'Lilia', a fictional half-elf I painted for many years originally based on Vivian my cousin who I was in love with since I was a child. My first wife had the same personality as Lilia, peaceful loving and caring, but she can live without me and I cannot. So my dream girl now is someone like me that we cannot live without each other. But if you can leave me and you are like Cynthia, my first wife, I will still be the happiest guy on earth. I just have to be not suicidal and try again
Hi davidwiz, I was very disturbed to read your post and hope that my advice will help. Firstly, if you're having suicidal thoughts, you should really speak to a GP/doctor. Anti-depressants and similar medication will help to control your thinking a bit which will ultimately assist you in finding your partner. It's difficult to meet anyone when you're not in the right frame of mind. Trying to meet someone new who is similar to a previous partner isn't a good thing. Nobody is the same – everyone is different – and expecting someone to be similar to someone else is unrealistic. It might also help you to meet someone completely different, to give you a different outlook and perspective of things. There are lots of single women who are not too concerned about having s*x and prefer affection. You need to find those women or someone with a similar s*x drive to you, otherwise, it’s likely your new partner will eventually cheat on you or leave you. I don't think what you're looking for is unrealistic. I think you will find someone easily but deal with your emotional pain first to keep your head clean. I wish you all the best of luck. Steve.
Dude, no woman is worth that. Go to your doctor's office and see if they can help you. Once you've sorted your head out, you can move on.
Thank you guys so much for your perspective.... cheating is not a problem at all, I love girls who cheat on me unless they leave me now that is devastating. Moreover, I love everyone. I gave my life savings to the homeless and have no selfishness, greed or jealousy, any girlfriend or wife of mine and her boyfriends or husbands can have some or most or all my money that I earn. It depends on how much my mom and son and wife want me to give out. My son said no don't give all your money to your girlfriend and her boyfriend, what if she dumps you daddy noob, oh and yes my wife now (the second one) can have any boyfriend or husband she wants and yes can definitely divorce me. I don't have romantic feelings for her, but at the same time in my profile and talks with girls will not leave her no matter how beautiful the girl is. I tried to find male lifetime companion for me after dismally failing at the online dating scene, I got several guys in the first several days interested in my wife, then I told her, then she said don't tell these guys anything about me and don't tell them where I work etc. Then they never spoke to me again even though I said I care for them and love them forever. Oh I also met two sweet and gentle guys Teddie and George both old men, but after telling them I'm not gay, they never spoke to me again. Does this world revolve around s*x? its ridiculous. When I was young and hung out with guys all they talk about is s*x. Why aren't you talking about comic books, movies, video games, art, music, philosophy, psychology, world politics, science, maths, engineering, law, quantum mechanical theory, etc. Yes I'm a super genius lol.
Comment/reply from: davidwiz, Canada, Calgary
Posted: 2020-03-05 15:17:06
Oh this is messages I sent to a girl on online dating. I didn't break up with her but at the same time wasn't in love with her after seeing her second and third pics I want to spend every minute with you for every day of my life, all money goes to you and whoever you love, you are the best thing that has ever happened to me like Cynthia and better than Cynthia if you don't leave me. All my comic books movies and video games are not necessary anymore. I mean I love them preciously but not nearly as much as you with you. It's millions of times better like with Cynthia. I only had my sketchbook with Cynthia in china and that was more than enough as long as I could spend as much time with her as I can. I saw the second picture of you now and it's not as beautiful as the first. You will have to send me more. I am so sorry about this, it's better we see if we're perfect together now than if I break your heart later. I already did this with Rita Sarpong, a girl with an incredible heart in Africa and I'm never doing this again. I have to find a pretty girl that makes time to stop, as leaves are falling down in the park as I kiss her and hold her hand they are falling in slow motion, like the universe readjusts itself slightly at her very presence. This is how I felt with Cynthia better than all the paintings and drawings I did before I met her. Yes I have to let you know this and im so sorry if I broke your heart you will find Mr. perfect. You are still extremely beautiful just send me more pics to see if you're like Cynthia. Your personality is for sure maybe even better.
Been suicidal (severe emotional pain) from 1998 to now losing the love of my life Cynthia
I really need and want a girl that wants to spend time with me, hold my hand and kiss and hug me. We touch each other's skin; no s*x is preferable but we can do it. I didn't do it with the first wife so she left me and I've been suicidal since. She left me in 1998 until now, 2021, and I will be suicidal for the rest of my life unless I find true love again. She was my dream girl. She always dressed like my dream girl 'Lilia', a fictional half-elf I painted for many years originally based on Vivian my cousin who I was in love with since I was a child. My first wife had the same personality as Lilia, peaceful loving and caring, but she can live without me and I cannot. So my dream girl now is someone like me that we cannot live without each other. But if you can leave me and you are like Cynthia, my first wife, I will still be the happiest guy on earth. I just have to be not suicidal and try again.
i also need to spend time with girls who wont cause me extreme emotional pain before im able to get that plane ticket, the last two were the worst rebecca and worst of all vicky valentine (if even thats her real name)... extreme romantic pain from rebecca after sending me two love poems forcing me to relive my life with cynthia, and vicky worst of all extreme sexual and romantic pain (my dinkie never got so hard so many times in the first day alone of talking to her, then was throbbing uncontrollably in bed for 3 hours after leaving computer) and romantic pain (constant romantic messaging, it was extremely painful)
waaaaaaaaaaaaaah i was talking to my mom and said should i kill myself because all girls hate me mom, she said no just try to live like me, doing your stuff at home lol whew thank god i have a mom like this, although terrified of her most of my life lol, in fact that was the worst fear i had when she was gone on world cruise and i wasnt taking my meds, terrified she would kick me out of the house because i had defied her.... and then my son helped me, saying your mom loves you no matter what daddy noob, and at that time i believed him 50-80% because i was terrified of my mom throughout life, she tore my ear off destroyed my artwork, my dad told me of the story he made her angry while she was practicing piano and she took chair and smashed it (not sure if my memory of what he told me is accurate), and very angry, gave me severe breathing problems while working at her kiosk in market mall...
plllllllllllllllze plzzzzzzzzzzzzzze i beg you talk with me at least 10 minutes before you blow me off, but i have to let you know im not going to stop talking to you girls even if i have a relationship with one or more of you until one of you is at my doorstep and in my arms forever, or until you find a better boyfriend or husband lol but my mom and me dont want a girl that will be with me temporarily lol
well this is nice, had a nice talk with a girl from ghana west africa but she broke up with me cause im not gonna stop talking to girls until shes at my doorstep lol sob
i thanked her from the bottom of my heart for talking with me
sure darling i wa
