Let's see.. My real name is Colin. I'm 4ft. 3in. tall, and I weigh 372lbs. I'm homeless, unemployed, devoid of worth and have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING going for me. I'm also the proud father of 14 amazing children. Hater of life. I practice unclean living every day. Dirty mind filthy body! That's my motto. I strongly dislike breathing, travel, working out, fun, adventures, and trying new things. Wanna be friends? I could use a ride!