WYLDDOGS

Once, after explaining to a phone solicitor I didn't want whatever she was selling, she ended the conversation by saying, "Ok, love you, bye", to which I assumed the polite response would be, "Love you too! Talk to you soon!".....a glaring silence followed ended by her gingerly hanging up the phone a full minute later. She never called back. This story has summed up my social awkwardness to a tee. Otherwise, I am a books, movies, music nerd. I like most things dark and macabre. I am obsessed with anything that has to do with sideshows, circuses, carnivals, or amusement parks. I’m sarcastic as all hell, and pretty damn cynical. I guess I should try harder to dream of lemon drops, rainbows and kitties wearing mittens. You’ll never see me at the beach without engineer boots on and I'm always up for a road trip. I either talk like a sailor or like I'm an 88 year old grandma. I will always choose a museum over a mall and think that spending the entire day there is 100% ok (this also applies to record stores and thrift shops). I have the gracefulness of a swan….with one leg….and one wing…and a wonky eye. Basically, expect me to come with bruises and to lack the skill to do anything sporty, including hopscotch. My dog and coffee are my best friend's, and I have the sleeping schedule of a vampire. My brother refers to me as "Obscure Punk Rock Sister’. I like to say I’m going to learn to play bass and drums, but I have the musical ability of said aforementioned swan. I’m full of useless knowledge, intermingled with a scrap of something useful every now and then….and um....skeeball!