The internet has stolen my soul, our humor has become one
I part my hair to the left for good days and right for evil days
I has laugh like a viking and it causes everyone to look
I will hold the door open for you and try to close it on you while you pass through it
Push me off a chair or a ledge, I'll enjoy it, unexpected flying
If I am giggling for seemingly no reason don't feel safe..ever
I crush spiders with my might, do not worry
Some days I'm a bit darker than normal... Can I has hugs?
I am deathly ticklish and that's crippling payback for anything
Don't want to be here, don't worry I will fake injury
I will always offer you snacks out of what ever bag I am holding, the bag may be empty when I ask. If it isn't I will pound and crush whatever is left in the bag to dust for you
Talk forever, I'll listen
Scared?.... me too...
Yeah I can dance, ready to pretend you don't know me?
Given serious thought to the concept of no premarital s*x... God damn skinny jeans
If you lie you are worthless
If you laugh you lose
I'm a sucker for a cute face
Ef you raff you roose
I don't care what you wear as long as it isn't my black hoodie... Don't even try
I don't freak out when you sing in the car so don't go crazy on me when I take my hands off the wheel to let out a hyperdyke air guitar solo
I listen to Atreyu, Killswitch Engage, Maximum the hormone, All that remains, In flames, Blind Guardian, HIM, A perfect circle, Tool, Rob zombie, Soilwork, Machinae supremacy,slipknot and stone sour but have a secret now not so secret love with classic rock.
an explosion of retard.
If you have read this far lol... I will probably end up marrying you. I'm comfortable with who I am so I hope you are too
I'm a poet and a writer on the inside but on the outside I'm all jokes.. I want a girl I can look after for the rest of my life and while I may not find her here who knows... MUST LOOK EVERYWHERE 
